Rajesh Sharma: Sushant left us searching for answers (FIRST PERSON)

(Acclaimed actor Rajesh Sharma worked with Sushant Singh Rajput in “Shuddh Desi Romance” and “M.S. Dhoni: The Untold Story”. Sharma is disturbed at the news of Sushants suicide, an actor he describes as “jovial” and “full of life”)

By Rajesh Sharma

Mumbai, June 16  “I have worked with Sushant Singh Rajput in ‘Shuddh Desi Romance’ and ‘M.S. Dhoni: The Untold Story’. I can recall him as a very jovial person who always wore a smile on his face.

I remember Sushant as a foodie, and also as someone who was very serious about cinema and his career.

In the MS Dhoni biopic, the way he had mastered Dhoni’s style of walking, batting, body language and behaviour, shows how deeply he had observed the cricketer. Sushant loved to play cricket. I feel, it is difficult to pull off a role like that if you cannot play cricket. He was so jovial and full of life, why did he do this? I am still unable to understand!

We stayed at the same hotel during the film’s shoot in Ranchi for a long time, where I got to know Sushant as a person. We used to have our breakfast and dinner together every day, and he would discuss a lot of things including food. He would suggest what to eat, which item tastes nice in the meal served by the hotel. He was a true foodie, even though he consumed food in very little amount.

During the shoot of ‘MS Dhoni’, he would sit behind the monitor while my shot was being done. After every shot of mine he would smile at me and tell me, ‘it’s a nice shot!’ He did not speak much but expressed a lot through his eyes. He was a director’s actor and respected Neeraj Pandey a lot. In fact, his behaviour towards everyone was very respectful. He used to call me Rajesh sir. He was a gentleman.

He was so highly educated — he was an engineer. His knowledge reflected in his words. Today, I feel deeply disturbed after hearing the news of his demise.

I feel, no matter what you are going through, suicide can never be the solution. You should face life and accept it as it comes. Life is a mixture of good and bad. Today, maybe you are experiencing a rough patch but tomorrow might be a bright sunny day!

It is shocking to me a jovial person like Sushant take such an extreme step. Nobody commits suicide suddenly. A prolonged mental rehearsal of suicide ultimately pushes you towards that particular moment.

There maybe multiple reasons behind a person deciding to end his life. We can only speculate the reasons behind Sushant’s suicide but the actual reason was only known to him. Sushant left a question, leaving us searching for answers.

(As told to Ahana Bhattacharya)